The topic of Enlightened Self Interest was already covered in an earlier post: Self-Interest: The Secret Sauce of the TameFlow Approach. In recent interactions both on LinkedIn and on the TameFlow Circle, I had the opportunity to clarify what I mean.
Enlightened self-interest—is central to my work, though it’s often misunderstood.
It’s all about YOU—your own interests, your own goals. Full stop.
It’s not about deliberately acting for the group’s benefit; that’s not the point.
The “enlightened” part comes from a shift in how you see things, shaped by mental models. Not just any models—they’re carefully crafted ways of thinking that re-frame what “self-interest” is for you.
So you start making decisions that serve YOU better, not because you’re suddenly noble, but because you’ve got a sharper grasp of what’s truly in your favor.
Those decisions, driven solely by your own interest, end up aligning with what others need too.
Unity of Purpose emerges not because you aimed for it, but as a byproduct of everyone acting on their own enlightened self-interest through the same coherent models. It is all supported by the Conceptual Integrity of the underlying Mental Models.
I say: “You have a license to be TOTALLY SELFISH!”
And yet, because of how these models are designed, the result is a system where decisions mesh, and reinforce; and purpose aligns—almost by accident.
That’s the secret sauce: decision making models that lets you prioritize yourself in a way that, without even trying, creates coherence and consistency across the board.
One reservation was raised about this idea drifting away from what John Stuart Mill intended, and expressed like this: “His point… was that the best way to improve one’s own quality of life was to raise the experience of the whole of the community one inhabits - in which case it really isn’t all about you, but you are more likely to benefit than.”
My reply was as follows.
It is not drifting away. It is materially different. It is important you understand this.
The moral philosophy of John Stuart Mill has nothing to do with this. And interpreting the Enlightened Self-Interest we have in TameFlow in that way is a mistake. In TameFlow, it is really about you. Period.
Now the thing that you have too understand is this: under normal conditions your Self-Interest is typically part of a zero-sum game. My gain, your loss.
Mills developed the idea of “Utilitarianism”, where people come to consider their long-term well-being as hinging on the well-being of the community. It’s not altruism, it is a calculated move. [No, that’s not a TameFlow MOVE!] So you’re still after your own good, but you’ve figured out that going it alone - screwing everyone else - tends to backfire.
There’s a difference in intent. Mills encourages you to think about others’ welfare as part of your calculus.
In TameFlow, Self-interest is stricter, in a way. It is about only focusing on your self, with no deliberate cogitation or calculus about the “greater” good of the group.
It is the Enlightenment of the Mental Models that will cause the “greater good.”
The enlightenment of Mills, if you can even call it as such, is kind of prescriptive. He wants you to see and cultivate social awareness. The “enlightenment” is of the kind: “I’m better off if I don’t piss off the group, or else I’ll have everyone against me.” That “enlightenment” is in no way transformative. It does not change your real, deeper Self-Interest. It just makes it comply to the surrounding social construct. It is a rational, educated, calculated self-interest, conditioned by the social consequences of not being a “good citizen". You expose your thoughts and behave as to not upset the group, and you really dampen and rein in your real Self-Interest. Thus you are not true to your-self in the name of (begrudgingly) serving a the “greater” good.
In TameFlow, the Enlightenment causes a qualitative change in your perception of what is your Self-Interest. You develop the insight that what you wanted up to the point of Enlightenment, is now really to your detriment. With Mills, you would still want what you wanted even before the dampening of your natural inclination.
In the TameFlow Approach, Enlightened Self-Interest isn’t just a tweak to your existing playbook—it’s a full-on shift in how you see what’s good for you. The “enlightenment” part is a qualitative leap, a rewiring of your perception through Mental Models (like Throughput Economics or Flow Efficiency, just to mention two prominent ones.)
Post-enlightenment, your sense of self-interest transforms: you don’t just want more of the same old stuff; you want something different, something smarter, because you now see what truly serves you. It’s not about dampening your drive—it’s about redirecting it with new insight. And yeah, the alignment with others happens, but that’s not why you do it; it’s a byproduct of your sharper, self-focused choices.
In TameFlow, enlightenment rewrites your definition of self-interest from the ground up. You don’t just adjust your tactics—you ditch the old map because you see it’s been leading you astray. With Mill, you keep the map; you just zoom out to avoid crashing into others. For TameFlow, the Mental Models are the game-changer—they don’t suppress your self-focus; they refine it into something new, something greater, something that benefits all while truly good for you. For Mills, reason and education nudge you to balance your self-focus with social good, but the core of what you’re after stays intact.
That’s a hell of a distinction, isn’t it?